um... suuuure I see it...

So unlike the first doctor visit, I was slightly more prepared/hormone stable for visit number 2. This, I'm sure, was good for all parties involved... This early on, I wanted my BabyDaddy to come to any appointments that might include any milestones of note, and early on, there are quite a few milestones. Later on, the poor man doesn't really need to show up every two weeks to hear the detailed report of my bloating and piddling, now does he? The medical professional gets some form of renumeration for listening, but really, what's in it for him?
This next appointment was a bit of a toss up. Since I'd been more than slightly spacey first go around, I had no idea what to expect for this one, having not had enough sense to ASK. Several of my 'reference' manuals ('what to expect' - for the clinically inclined, and 'girlfriends guide' - for those who need REAL advice), had mentioned that there was the chance of hearing a heart beat at this stage of babybaking - which would be wicked cool and I didn't want him to miss that, but then, I really had no clue what was actually going to go down. My BabyDaddy, being the best BabyDaddy ever, was willing to take time off from work and tearass across town just on the off-chance that we might hear a little thump-a-thump. This general sweetum-ness is one of the many reasons I let him knock me up in the first place.
Like I said, I didn't know what to expect, but I was reallly realllly hoping the doc would do the heartbeat with the professional baby heartbeat listener thinggie (<- technical medical term). I mean how cool would that be! Plus, I did want the BabyDaddy's commute to be worth it - if we didn't do anything but talk about unpleasant bodily functions, I'd feel a little bad for him.
Imagine my joy and delight when the doc decided to pull out the big guns and do not a listener thinggie but a lookie thinggie (aka an ultrasound) - woo hoo! Way better than hearing the heartbeat, we'd get to SEE the spawn.
My joy was damped slightly when I saw the ultrasound, wheeled out with an extended apology. 'Now remember this is out satellite office so this is one of our older machines. Actually, I think this is our oldest machine, so the resolution won't be so great...' We're talking soviet bloc surplus here, really, but hey - any baby picture is a good baby picture at this stage.
The upside of this circa 1972 machinery is that this was an 'outtie' ultrasound. For those of you who haven't had the pleasure of yet learning such ugly details about the underbelly of pregnancy, let me enlighten you. In order to get a better view of the growing human implant, ultrasound machines will try to get closer to the baby-to-be. And how would one get closer? This about it... the only way to get closer is to go...um... inside. Things you neither knew, nor wanted to know, huh?
So I was pleased to know my initiation into the world of ultrasounds was a gentle exterior one, mercifully. The doc flopped me onto my back and greased me up like an old Chevy at a jiffy lube. My hope is that when I get upgraded to the 'detailed' view version, they use at least as much gunk as they did this time cause, man, did I need a bath when they were done.
After a bit of poking around a grey and black lumpy peanut appeared on the screen. The doc jabs and turns a bit and says 'there it is - there's the baby and there's the heart beat! See it?' Um... no actually... I look over at the hubby 'Honey? Do you see it?' He jabs vaguely with his finger, 'Of course! it's right there! See that little fluttering? Mid-peanut lump?' Um...again with the no... It was like one of those annoying as all heck Magic Eye things 'Can't you see the ship?! It's right THERE?! Just relax your eyes... I mean it's right THERE!' Man was that annoying...
The doc is swiping the price scanner about willy nilly at this point 'yep everything looks really good... looks good in here.... would you like me to print out a picture for you?' Hope ignites in my little heart... 'Yes please!' Figuring I could get the hubby to point to the exact where of the magic eye ship of the heartbeat is after the fact. Maybe I saw it and just didn't KNOW that I saw it... maybe.... you know... it could happen!
'I told you it was old, but you can get kinda negative version' As soon as she handed over the printout, I knew I wasn't getting aaaaanything else out of this...This thing looked like it was printed on a dot matrix printer I swear. I'd seen all I was going to see for this go around.
So no, I didn't see my baby-to-be's heart beating, but my babydaddy did, and that's good enough for me.