Mother's Day Surprise

The Hubble took me and The Bean out for breakfast on Mother's Day. What I really wanted was to sleep THROUGH breakfast well into mid afternoon or perhaps dinner time, but schedules unfortunately did not allow. Nor will they likely ever allow until roughly 15 years from now, best case. The week before we just had an anniversary, and his gift had finally showed up, so when we started our meal I said, "Hey babe, I have your anniversary present. I've been trying to decided when to give it to you, and now seems as good a time as any." He looked at me and said,

"Are you pregnant?"

[Pregnant?! WTF?!?]

Me: "Um.... no. No, I'm not. Why on EARTH did your mind go there?!"

Him: "Oh I dunno, it just did."

[Are you CRAZY?! I just shed enough baby blubber to get back into my fat pants! Pregnant AGAIN?! *snort*]

Me: "Oh, um, well...I'm not. Pregnant, I mean. Not."

Him: "OK, well, that's just what I thought you were going to say..."

Me: "Um, yeah, no. Not pregnant.

[long pause while curiousity overpowers good sense]

But, well. . . what was your reaction? Before I clarified that I was not in the family way, I mean?"
Him: "Elation - and some serious questions about finances and logistics. But mostly elation."

[Wait - He'd actually WANT another baby?!]

Me: "Seriously?! Wow. Um . . . huh."

Him: "What? It's surprising that I would be excited to make another one of these [gesturing to kidlet vigorously rubbing pancakes into her hair] with my beloved wife?"

Me: "Well, [looking at kidlet now vigorously rubbing bananas into her hair] they do have their downsides. . . plus, we'd not really TALKed about it. So I guess I was just . . . surprised, is all."

Him: "What, do you NOT want to have another one?"

[Damn. That is a good question. DO I want another baby?]

Me: "Oh! Well, No. Not NOT want to have another one. But I wouldn't mind a good night's sleep before we started again. If we WERE going to. Which we aren't, right now, at least. Are we?"

Him: "Well, probably not. I mean, not NOW. With school and finances the timing might not be ideal. "

[Um, have ya SEEN our bank statement recently?]

Me: "Um, no. Not ideal is the understatement of the century."

Him: "But I guess there never is a GOOD time, for something like this...."

[especially since I'm not getting any younger, and we can't wait too long if we really DID want another one cause it might not happen...]

Me: "True, I suppose . . . but still, RIGHT now may be VERY not good vs. kinda not good. Maybe."

Him: "So, yeah. Not now, I guess."

[The physical and emotional toll, the constant what if worries, the blood pressure nightmare, the chance of birth defects, the loss of sleep before AND after, and doing it all with a rambuncious toddler? I can't honestly say I'm ready to sign up for that today.]`

Me: "Yeah, I guess not. Not NOW, like 'this second' now."

Him: "But not 'never', right?"

[looking over at toddler styling her hair into a crazy spike-y mohawky mess and *squee*ing with the pure joy of it all.]

Me: "No. Definitely not 'never'.

[Baby giggles get me every time.]

So, um, anyway. . .

I got you tickets to Cirque du Soleil."


Happy Belated Mother's Day!